Belated Understandings

  The shove. The push. The cry and whisper.

Celluloid and pixel fantasies of what family life should be die hard.

I have a female relative who had let me down time and time again. In my head, I’d play out revenge fantasies. She would put me down again and I’s finally get it together to say something witty like, “It took you five minutes to insult me. You’re slipping.”

But all my grievances fell away today. Something finally clicked into place. I know that she had a strained childhood. The siblings were split in a family crisis. And her first marriage was abusive. Someone mentioned that she fled from her city to where we were living in the middle of the night and I realized that she was fleeing from her husband.

She wasn’t the only one. Her sister was beaten by her husband as well. And their growing up had dark patches and the typical lies, secrets and silence.

I’ve put a lot of time in on domestic violence issues as a volunteer and foundation executive. But I didn’t/couldn’t/wouldn’t see what was in front of my face in my own family.

So once again into the breach to integrate policy with humanity, intellect and compassion. Better armed and counting myself wiser until I stumble over the next gap.

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About liftingasweclimb

Mildred Lewis writes and directs for theater, television, film and the web. She's also a full time professor, Christian, activist and troublemaker with a passion to save as much of the world as she can.
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